Thank you for sharing your personal experience

---

My dear Chiz,

you are going to be really popular with some Kcers.

Don't you know that, according to the Cambodians, it's bad form to be as critical and as outspoken as you are?

Never mind, welcome to the club because I don't think I am different from you.

Thank you for sharing your personal experience.

You have highlighted some key issues and, unfortunately, your analysis is correct.

You did overgeneralize somewhat. Many people in the countryside are extremely hard-working but, yes, you are right, some of them are too religious, some like to enjoy life too much, some are incredibly lazy, but they are mostly honest.

At the risk of generalizing like you, many, many people in the cities (a lot of Chinese extraction) are very hard-working but can be very money-minded, too.

You talked about being conflicted. How do you think people like me feel?
Again, welcome to the club.

And you don't even internalise Cambodian politics anywhere as much as I do.
I am so conflicted that I am pretty sure that I am going to have an ulcer sooner or later. Well, a Kcer did say that I take Cambodian politics extremely seriously.

We only need to look at the way some Kcers react to comparisons with other ethnic minorities, especially the Vietnamese. You have seen the defensiveness.

It's almost as if Cambodians think that constructive criticism means personal attack.

Well, unless Cambodians all around the world stop feeling sorry for themselves, stop thinking in terms of "glass is already half-full, Oh, but we have come such a long way" and start fixing their flaws, Cambodians and Cambodia will continue to be perceived as and to be the "losers" of South-East Asia.

Yet, we Cambodians are capable of being achievement-oriented, hard-working but also of enjoying life, of not being money-minded.

quote:

---

Originally posted by jaya_kampuchea
i find myself deeply agreeing with you 100% on this chiz. when my mom went to visit cambodia which was about a decade ago, she said her sister(my aunt) was lazy and didn't try to find other means of making a living. she lived off of her kids who were just regular farmers and even they can barely make a living. the khmer people are definitely afraid of change and their mentality is pretty backward. they need to stop being superstitious and learn from others such as their neighbors thailand and vietnam to be proactive and just stop being lazy! i am sorry to say but khmer people are friggin lazy! even my mom says this and just hearing similar stories about your relatives and i've heard similar stories of other people's relatives also just making me feel really disappointed. i see no reason why there are so many beggars in cambodia with the exception of the landmine victims(amputees) but those other lazy bums need to get the hell up and look for something to do. it's embarrassing and i don't want to generalize but there are many khmer people who are lazy.

another thing, about 2 years ago my relatives from cambodia called our house and asked for money because one of my relatives was really sick. we sent them $1000 they were suppose to split the money. one of them claimed she donated the money to a temple and my parents didn't believe her one bit. they called several days later and asked for more money. the other one said he never received the money and my parents just didn't believe them. i can see now why my parents never want to give them money.

[Message last modified 02-12-2005 09:52pm by jaya_kampuchea]

---

yeah relatives on both my mom's and dad's sides have taken money without splitting it with their own siblings

quote:

---

Originally posted by khemara15
My dear Chiz,

you are going to be really popular with some Kcers.

Don't you know that, according to the Cambodians, it's bad form to be as critical and as outspoken as you are?

Never mind, welcome to the club because I don't think I am different from you.

Thank you for sharing your personal experience.

You have highlighted some key issues and, unfortunately, your analysis is correct.

You did overgeneralize somewhat. Many people in the countryside are extremely hard-working but, yes, you are right, some of them are too religious, some like to enjoy life too much, some are incredibly lazy, but they are mostly honest.

At the risk of generalizing like you, many, many people in the cities (a lot of Chinese extraction) are very hard-working but can be very money-minded, too.

You talked about being conflicted. How do you think people like me feel?
Again, welcome to the club.

And you don't even internalise Cambodian politics anywhere as much as I do.
I am so conflicted that I am pretty sure that I am going to have an ulcer sooner or later. Well, a Kcer did say that I take Cambodian politics extremely seriously.

We only need to look at the way some Kcers react to comparisons with other ethnic minorities, especially the Vietnamese. You have seen the defensiveness.

It's almost as if Cambodians think that constructive criticism means personal attack.

Well, unless Cambodians all around the world stop feeling sorry for themselves, stop thinking in terms of "glass is already half-full, Oh, but we have come such a long way" and start fixing their flaws, Cambodians and Cambodia will continue to be perceived as and to be the "losers" of South-East Asia.

Yet, we Cambodians are capable of being achievement-oriented, hard-working but also of enjoying life, of not being money-minded.

---

why do you think this is though? do you think its the role of buddhism and karma in our culture? whereas east asians are very influenced by confu.cianism and the idea of self cultivation.. i dunno.. ive discussed this a lot with my boyfriend who is chinese... the chinese are such good businessmen and they're willing to taking risks.. their culture is based on luck -- and gambling's a huge problem.. whereas i find cambodians would rather prefer a stable job even though it doesn't pay too much than gamble on owning a business

i dont really know too much about khmers in cambodia, but here in the US, we're like the blacks of asia.. it makes me sad to see our community have the same problems as blacks in the inner city.. i dunno where we're going.

but ive become hopeful since joining KC.. there are a lot of khmers in college and doing good for themselves.. maybe the upcoming generations would fare better?

[Message last modified 02-13-2005 02:00am by Chiz]

 Lee Kuan Yew explained

---

Chiz,

This is one explanation provided by Lee Kuan Yew, more or less the Father of Moden Singapore.

In his own words,

I think you must have something in you to be a "have" nation. You must want. That is the crucial thing. Before you have, you must want to have. And to want to have means to be able first, to perceive what it is you want; secondly, to discipline and organise yourself in order to possess the things you want-the industrial sinews of our modern economic base; and thirdly, the grit and stamina, whicn emans cultural mutations in the way of life in large parts of the tropical areas of the world where the human being has never found it necessary to work in the summer before the autumn, and save it up for the winter.

In large areas of the world, a cultural pattern is determined by many things, including climatic conditions. As long as that persists, nothing will ever emerge. And for it to emerge, there must be this desire between contending factors of the "have" nations to try and mould the "have not" nations after their own selves. IF they want that strongly enough, competition must act as an accelerator and no more than an accelerator to the creation of modern, industrial, technological societies in the promitive agricultural regions of the world.

I think Asia can be very clearly demarcated into several distinct parts-East Asia is one: it has got a different tempo of its own. So have South Asia and Southeast Asia. I think this is crucial to an understanding of the possibilities of either development for the good or development which is not in the interest of peace and human happiness in the region.

I like to demarcate-I mean not in political terms- demarcate them half in jest, but I think half with some reality on the basis of difference in the tempo according to the people who know what these things are. I eman East Asia: Korea, Japan and mainland China and including the Republic of China in Taiwan and Vietnam. They are supposed to be the Mahayana Buddhists, And the there is Cambodia (my emphasis), Thailand, Burma, Ceylon, which are supposed to be Hinayana Buddhists. According to the Hinayana Buddhists, if the bedbug disturbs you, then you take your mattress and shake it off; there is that compassion not only for the human being but also for the bedbug, and you give it another chance and you let if off. Either it finds its way onto some other creature or it finds its way back to your bed. But watching the Japanese over the years, I have not the slightest doubt that it is not what they do. And I think this makes some difference. I am not talking now-isms or ideologies. It is something deeper. It is part of the tempo, the way of life.

Kwang, Fernadez or Tan, Lee Kuan Yew, The man and his ideas , Times Editions, Singapore-Nineteen Ninety Eight

While I agree with Lee Kuan Yew, I don't think Cambodians need to kill the nedbugs or to be as money-minded and as materialistic as many Singaporeans to become a "have" nation.
[Message last modified 02-14-2005 06:09am by khemara15]

 The KR and the current regime have contributed

---

I think the Khmer Rouge and the current government have contributed to what Cambodians are like today.

http://khmer.cc/community/t.c?b=1&t=2092&o=1

Because of their decisions, most survivors were so conditioned by the "survival of the fittest" Chaen Kbal See Kbal mentality that prevailed from 1975 to 1979 and during the hardship years from 1970 to about 1985 that many Cambodians (especially in the cities) nowadays and their children think that this is a perfectly acceptable mentality.

The emphasis on money and wealth (regardless of how it is gained) has become so overwhelming that most Cambodian poor families nowadays will not hesitate to sell their daughters’ virginity and then into prostitution. This is rationalized away as a way of being Katanho even if neighbors were to find out. And once it becomes an acceptable and maybe even admired practice, it becomes standard practice and ultimately, many compromises are accepted. Eventually, the moral fiber of that society is contaminated by e.g. the idea that corruption is a "natural way of life" (see below).


World Bank President Wolfensohn is right when he emphasized the role of Cambodian youth in "reforming Cambodian society"

http://web.worldbank.org/WBSITE/EXTERNAL/COUNTRIES/EASTASIAPACIFICEXT/0,,contentMDK:20352376~menuPK:208951~pagePK:146736~piPK:146830~theSitePK:226301,00.html

He noted that Cambodia needs a paradigm shift from a society that accepts corruption as a natural way of life, to one that demands the highest ethical standards, one that focuses on education and hard work, and noting that young people have a crucial role to play in making this shift, provided they refuse to play any part in corrupt practices. He reminded youth of the lessons he learned from speaking to other youth groups, in other countries, who told him that “youth may be the future, but we are also the now.” He said that although Cambodians have suffered from a terrible past, the country has a great deal of unrealized potential and youth are an important part of that ; they must willing and confident in taking a leadership role in reforming Cambodian society.
[Message last modified 02-14-2005 06:40am by khemara15]

I don't want to sound like a religious preacher or anything. I think one of the MOST IMPORTANT thing that Khmer or non-Khmer youth today missing is the absence of spirituality. I think SPIRITUALITY is the force within that drive people to do extra-ordinary things. Whether is it in sport, in school, in war or in business; if you don't have the drive from within, you're going to have difficulty succeeding.

How do you obtain spirituality? You obtain it by believing that there is something greater than ourselves out there and you maintain a close relationship with him through prayer. Him- meaning any supreme being, can be anything you envision it to be. I know this sound crazy. Sometime when I feel this sudden surge of spirituality, I feel like I can do anything. But the problem is trying to achieve it and maintaining it everyday. Nowaday, I felt like I'm losing touch little by little.

The point is, if you have your own kid and wanted him or her not to stray. You must introduce them to this higher being. If you don't believe in what I said, look around you and take notes: people who believe in something vs people who doesn't.

quote:

---

Originally posted by khemara15
Please click on

http://www.rfa.org/khmer/pordamean/2004/11/23/poemaboutnationalID

and then click on " sound" icon

to hear an interview with three poets and particularly to hear

the poem "Khmer Pre Roub"

By Cambodian-American Miss Yan Sonmony (her nom de plume is Meas Mom




េខមរា
[Message last modified 11-29-2004 11:51am by khemara15]

---

I'm proud to say that I have never once claimed to be of other nationale other than being a full Khmer. My parents raised my brothers and I to be honest and proud of ourselves as an individuals and also a Cambodians, but I have to point out that being born and raised in Cambodia for more than half of our teenage lives may have played a significant role in us being who we are today.

It hurts me to see Khmer kids on the streets, I have seen many wearing Angkor Wat logo t-shirts hanging around in this one particular spot (location witheld) almost every morning and every day. It hurts to see Khmer kids not seizing this wonderful opportunity that being presented to them, opportunity of getting an education, a carrer and giving back to the parents. It hurts to know that what my parents fight so hard for my brothers and I to have is being thrown away by others.